Articles on What Impacts Executive Functions?

by Dr. Lynn Margolies

Back to Executive Function Deficits & ADHD

The characters from the vignettes in Dr. Margolies’ articles are fictitious and designed to be relatable to many people and common themes. They are not based on any patient’s individual situation or disclosure but were derived from a composite of people and events for the purpose of representing real-life situations and psychological dilemmas. Terms of Use.

A Guide to Sending Your Teenager Off to College: Overcoming Common Challenges

With the arrival of summer, many teenagers will be preparing to go off to college and leaving home for the first time. In this final leg of the race, families face many challenges navigating this transition.

Amazing Doesn’t Have to Mean Superhuman & Perfectionistic

Dr. Margolies’ Letter to the editor with a response from the publication.

Executive Function Problem or Just a Lazy Kid: Part 1

A common denominator and basis of all executive functioning is the ability to hold things in mind, step back and reflect. Without this capacity, it is difficult to have perspective, judgment, or emotional control. Therefore, admonishing or punishing children who are not following the rules because of limited executive function is not only ineffective, but leads children who are already frustrated and discouraged to feel bad about themselves and unsupported.

Executive Function Problem or Just a Lazy Kid? Part 2 — Parent Tips and Guidance

Without accurately understanding children’s behavior, parents and teachers may intervene in ways that compound the situation, creating a control struggle on top of the original problem. To be effective in helping children, we must accurately diagnose the problem and be curious about what is happening: What is causing this behavior? Though defiance and executive function deficits can look the same on the surface, a problem of defiance is handled differently than a problem of limited capacity.

How Parents Can Help Teens Under Academic Pressure (and 5 Common Traps)

When grades are slipping and teens don’t seem to be taking action, it’s easy for parents to react from frustration and helplessness. Under pressure, we can fall into common traps without realizing it. These common instinctive reactions, even if they feel justified, add to a child’s anxiety and discouragement, destabilizing them and further reducing motivaton.

Is Perfectionism on the Rise in Teenagers? The Startling News About It’s Impact on Mental Health

Perfectionism in teens fuels anxiety and increases suicide risks. Learn how family and community pressure can silently affect teen mental health.

Is There an ADD Epidemic in Adults?

With ADD, lack of capacity can trump the best intentions to use will-power and self-discipline to stay on track. ADD deficits often cause longstanding effects on careers and relationships, leading to underachievement and a chronic sense of frustration, shame, and failure. Educating ourselves and our loved ones about ADD is essential to prevent needless judgment, shaming, and self-blame that are common with this condition. Then, instead, we will be in a position to harness the unique, inspired energy of the ADD mind.

Parent Anxiety Over Kids’ Perceived Failures (Part 1)

One of the most common difficulties for parents is how to contain their reactions and not make things worse when children don’t do well or fail to measure up to their expectations. Families with kids who are not high achievers, or who have academic or psychological challenges, are most vulnerable.

Parent Guilt Over Kids’ Perceived Failures (Part 2)

When parents feel guilty or excessively bad for children, it’s harder to set limits, be truthful and direct, and challenge kids within their zone of capability. This inhibits opportunities for children to develop self-control, confidence and realistic expectations of themselves and others, perpetuating the cycle of underachievement.

Reactive Parenting with Teens – A Common Cause of Broken Connections

This column tells a story based on a composite of real-life situations in families, depicting both the teenager’s and parent’s perspective.

The Danger of Hidden Pain In High Achieving Teens

This column tells a story based on a composite of real-life situations in families, depicting both the teenager’s and parent’s perspective with children who are high achievers and “too good” to be true, while dangerously suffering in silence. The story is followed by the therapist’s psychological analysis and guidance, teaching parents what to look for with seemingly perfect teens, how to interpret when a child’s behavior is a disguised way to ask for help, and what to do.

The Paradox of Pushing Kids to Succeed

Our teens are embedded in a culture driven by competition and perfectionism, where success is defined by status, performance and appearance. These values are transmitted to our children nonverbally through our emotional state and through what we notice, are impressed with, and praise or discourage in them.

The Paths to Progress for Our Graduates

Perfectionism in teens is rising with pressure to succeed. Learn how parental expectations impact mental health and shape success beyond high school.

The Pressure Cooker Before College: How to Actually Help Your Teen

The senior year countdown to college brings out parents’ worries and fears, which increases teens’ own anxieties and self-doubt. During this time of escalating pressure and stress in families, parents can fall into common traps that defeat their intention to help and interfere with teens developing capacities. This article helps parents recognize the traps and use positive strategies to actually help their teen.

The Unique Strengths of Sensitive Kids and How to Help Them Thrive

This blog discusses the unique strengths of sensitive kids.

Unintended Effects of Popular Advice

Dr. Margolies’ Commentary on A New York Times Column: Sorry, You Don’t Get an A for Effort (December 29th 2025)

When Perseverance Costs You Success

Most of us know that persevering – staying the course and not giving up despite difficulties and setbacks – is an important part of what it takes to be successful in many areas of life. But perseverance, like other intrinsically healthy behaviors, can be taken too far and actually work against moving forward.

When Your Kids Disappoint You

Parents may have a clear vision of their child’s “potential.” When their child’s actual performance does not measure up, parents often become fearful about their futures. Even more unnerving is when kids don’t share these visions or worries. It’s enough to make any parent want to pressure and criticize their child. “Potential,” however, must incorporate personality, developmental and emotional factors which impinge on resilience and capacity. For example, bright kids may get poor grades when they are unable to withstand pressure, or when energies are consumed by urgent concerns such as fitting in socially or fear of failing.