Articles on Setting Limits with Manipulative People

by Dr. Lynn Margolies

Back to Assertiveness & Boundaries

The characters from the vignettes in Dr. Margolies’ articles are fictitious and designed to be relatable to many people and common themes. They are not based on any patient’s individual situation or disclosure but were derived from a composite of people and events for the purpose of representing real-life situations and psychological dilemmas. Terms of Use.

How to Set Boundaries With Difficult People

Boundary setting is challenging. Most people have difficulty saying no or setting a boundary. Predictably, ithout a strategy, people resort to repeating the same tactics that haven’t worked or give in and then get resentful. Boundaries protect relationships, and this can used to leverage your own motiavation to set them and as an explicit rationale with another person.

How to Succeed at Influencing People in Difficult Conversations

Thoughtful preparation when it comes to conversations involving strong feelings is worth the effort in order to maximize success and effect damage control. Fast forwarding in our minds to predict how communications will likely play out can make it quickly obvious whether, with whom, how, and in what situations we want to engage around loaded topics.

Mind Games in Families: How to Keep Your Sanity

Are you giving up your power in relationships with intimidating people? Understanding the psychology behind what’s happening can help you act from a position of strength.

Outlawed by Your In-Laws

Failure to set appropriate boundaries with a mother often results in persistent in-law conflicts and problems in the marriage. Many marital issues fall into this category and can be traced to habitual boundary difficulties between mothers and sons which spill over into the man’s relationship with his wife.

Serving Up Guilt This Holiday Season

Guilt can be used unconsciously to get loved ones to do what we want. Even though this method doesn’t always produce the intended effects, we may resort to it when feeling helpless in the face of longing and disappointment.

Surefire Ways to Alienate Your Adult Children (and Other People)

This article discusses confusing patterns that occur with narcissistic and controlling parents and other people.

The Psychology of the Guilt-Tripper

Does a family guilt-tripper have an emotional hold over you? Here’s what makes them tick and why you feel you are being controlled.

Why Appeasing or Being Silent Attracts Aggression in Bullies

Dr. Margolies’ Commentary on A New York Times Column: Trump Is Playing Rope-a-Dope With Elite Law Firms (Jeffrey Toobin, March 5)